It all started magical. With emotions skyrocketing like balloons left loose and affections exploding in the air like fireworks at New Year's eve. I was not really sure, though, if it was mutually felt or it was just a product of my imagination. My unconscious efforts to divert my attention off myself and my unconsummated love for my children's father. Our love has faded with the back to back betrayal of trust and broken intimacy due to being far apart from each other, proximity and communication wise. I wouldn't discount the fact that you also started it. You were flirting with me but you didn't have the balls to sustain it to the end.
At this point, I would like to do away with all the signs that I just concocted out of my desire to be loved by you. If you were the person that I thought you were, you wouldn't be doing this to me now. You wouldn't be treating me ill. Should I discount the possibility that you are also just covering up your true side because you are afraid of being rejected or getting hurt? Are you just protecting yourself from the inevitable disgrace if you succumb to the feelings?
Whatever the real score is, it really hurts me deep inside. I am now regretting the fact that I let myself fall again and have put all the hurt upon myself. I know that it's futile knowing what you really felt for me. Was it a genuine connection or plain game playing with the opposite sex? I would say it's the latter.
You could be enjoying preying on naive women's vulnerability, at the expense of their own emotional downfall. Nonetheless, you have just lost a supporter. I wouldn't buy any of your impressionistic efforts anymore. They're all plain crap to me now. I was fooled and my trust was betrayed. All you care about is elevating yourself up high without any care for the people who've helped you up. You take all the credit and you do not trust other people's capacity.
It was a major turn off, I should say. You are even a better jerk than all of the disgusting men that I've met combined. You do not deserve all the admiration and care, at all, for all you know.
I guess the best defense against your type of species is to withdraw all attention. I would still be working to the fullest but I wouldn't trust your instincts now. You haven't even proven anything worthy to be emulated. You go by the book but you don't accomplish anything. You are pathetic and you are the meanest person I have ever met all my life.
